October Noteworthies

This month, I coordinated not one, but two weddings!  The first wedding was at La Venta, a beautiful venue overlooking the ocean in Palos Verdes.  I truly felt blessed to be a part of this couple's wedding.  The Bride and her family were so gracious and sweet and they made my job so easy because they were so organized and go-with-the-flow.  I was also really fortunate to have my sidekick by my side partnering with me throughout the day.  It's amazing how well we work together and how much fun we have - it hardly feels like work at all!

A photo posted by Truly Blessed 👩🏻🐶 (@trulyblessedssl) on Oct 1, 2016 at 9:21pm PDT

My second wedding was at Figueroa House in Los Angeles.  It was raining pretty hard in the morning, but I promised the bridal party it would stop come time for the ceremony to start, and praise the Lord, it did!  Everything went according to plan with no major glitches - whew!  Now, I do have to say that I do not recommend this venue.  The venue coordinators were not pleasant to deal with as they were "fake nice" the type of nice where it's obligatory with an underlying tone of arrogance to boot.  They require onsite pre-production meetings, the couple to buy wedding insurance, the couple to rent basic 6' tables and trash cans (yes, even trash cans!), and the staff was just overall very hands off with everything, and complained when the bartenders had to bus the empty drink glasses because the caterers weren't cleaning up their glasses quick enough.  Ack, so high maintenance!

I also attended mid-week service at Angelus Temple to see Nick Vujicic speak.  This guy is truly amazing beyond words.  He has such a wonderful spirit despite the fact that he does not have any limbs...yes, you read that correctly.  He is truly a testament to how wonderful God is and how He can use anyone who is willing to follow Him to reach millions of lives.  I highly encourage anyone who has never heard of him to Google him.  Even if you aren't religious, you will still be inspired.

A photo posted by Truly Blessed 👩🏻🐶 (@trulyblessedssl) on Oct 13, 2016 at 9:05pm PDT

 

And, time for my book review.  I read The Girl on the Train literally in. one. sitting.  I don't think I am going to see the movie because I can't imagine the movie being able to top what I imagined in my mind while reading.  This book leaves you in suspense until the very end and is very difficult to put down.  It is a good mindless read if you want to just "get away".  It's basically about a woman who has gone through some rough times and finds herself single, barely existing, but rides the train to and from every day.  The train stops at a particular stop most days where she is able to observe a couple whom she idealizes in her mind until one day, something changes and she finds herself getting involved and way in over her head.

Finally, hoping you had a Happy Halloween!  I was disappointed that I didn't get one trick or treater again this year.  Gone are the days where kids trick or treat in their neighborhoods, but instead, their parents drive them to the popular streets where houses are fully decked out and swarms of children are going door to door where homeowners don't even have the time to close their front doors before their doorbell rings again.  Sad.

August Noteworthies

This month, I want to start with my book review for a book recommended by my sister in law.

So heartwarming.  This is a story about a man who suffered the loss of his son, is a recovering alcoholic and decides to spend his summer traveling to different national parks with his late son while spreading his ashes along the way.  His RV breaks down and through that event, encounters two young boys who grew up in a troubled household and ends up taking them with him on his journey.  It was so beautiful to see their relationship unfold and how they unexpectedly changed each others' lives forever.  After finishing this book, I feel inspired to rent an RV and drive to the Grand Canyon, Zion, and Bryce Canyon with Echo (although dogs are only allowed in limited areas at these parks, boo!).  And there was the cutest dog, Woody in the story as well and of course, I pictured him to look like Echo.  If you're looking for a book that inspires you to get out into nature and leave you feeling warm inside and bursting with love, this is a book for you!

This month was all about birthdays.  Happy birthday to my sister-in-law, my brother, J, and most importantly, my Mom who turned 60!  My brother and I took her to Mastros a day before her actual birthday and then we celebrated with the rest of the family on her actual birthday.  

I was also quite spontaneous this month taking two less than 24 hour trips just for the fun of it!  Earlier in the month, I flew up to SF and visited my old stomping grounds from when I used to work up there (i.e., ferry building, Miette's cupcakes).  Toward the end of the month, I went to Chicago and covered all the touristy stuff in one FULL day.  Think Navy Pier, the Bean, Buckingham Fountain, Soldier Stadium, architecture tour, Hancock building....yes, everything!

 The weather in Chicago was absolutely perfect!

Finally, I ended the month with an amazing time at Outcry where Kari Jobe and Hillsong Y+F performed.  I always love worship - it is when I feel most connected and at peace!

Hillsong Y+F. Kari Jobe. Sister in Faith. ❤️ #outcrytour #hillsongyoungandfree #karijobe #trulyblessed

A video posted by Truly Blessed (@trulyblessedssl) on Aug 30, 2016 at 1:23am PDT

Book Review: Sandcastle Kings

As June was quite uneventful with the exception of Vous Conference which I already blogged about, I'll jump right into my book of the month.  This month, I started two different books, both of which I could not get through!  This has never happened before especially with my goal oriented mentality where once I start something I must finish!  Seriously though, I couldn't get through the others, so I settled on Sandcastle Kings by Rich Wilkerson which I got as a gift from Vous Conference!

This book was an easy read and I enjoyed the personal stories Pastor Rich shared throughout because they were relatable and quite humorous!  I enjoyed the format of how the book was written by telling a few stories from the Bible and then highlighting Jesus' character and Christian values from those stories.  I most appreciated him explaining the meaning of Jesus dying on the cross for us as I think for those who didn't grow up in the church, that could be a difficult concept to grasp so having it dumbed down brings a little more gravity to the sacrifice that was made.  I recommend this book! 

Here is one of my favorite videos of Pastor Rich describing his shopping experience with his wife.  So ridiculous, but oh so true!

 

Vous Conference

I randomly decided to attend Vous Conference, a conference held by a church led by Rich and DawnChere Wilkerson in Miami, FL this month.  It was the quickest long distance turnaround trip I have ever done, and in many ways it was worth it.  We heard from 4 amazing speakers, and I mean AMAZING where even I wanted to stand up and yell "Amen!" or "Preach it!" all whilst pumping my fist, but of course shy me kept my bum glued onto my seat.  The Vous Church blog gives a great summary of the weekend, but here is my quick snippet and what I got most out of Vous Conference.  All my photos were pulled directly from their blog.

Friday night started out with worship and then we heard from Pastor Rich Wilkerson who preached on the topic of Even If...

 Pastor Dawnchere and Rich Wilkerson

• Sit with someone.  Stand for something because if you don't stand for something, you will fall for everything.  Walk through everything.
• When life heats up, that is when God shows up
• You can't change what you can't tolerate
• Worship from a blessing, not for a blessing
• Favor is not found in where you are, it's found in who you are
• If you are too big to serve, then you are probably too small to lead

On Saturday, we heard from his wife Dawnchere who preached on the topic of "Let It Shine".  Let me tell you, this young lady can preach!

• Most people pray for patience, self control, understanding, etc...but what they don't realize is that these are all fruits of labor from a relationship with Jesus and are not "sold separately".  So we have to ask ourselves, do we want a relationship with Jesus and what do we do to build that relationships?

We also heard from Robert Madu who preached on the topic of "From Water To Wilderness".

• Water was likened to getting Baptized, or the beginning of your walk with Jesus.  Wilderness referred to your life journey after making that commitment, meaning that just because you devote yourselves to God doesn't meant that everything is smooth sailing from there on out
• After you experience in the water, how are you going to win the war in the wilderness?
• You have to know where you are (what season of life are you in?)
• The word is your weapon
• You have to know what's at stake
• Know where your help comes from

Next up was my favorite pastor of all time, Erwin McManus.  He leads Mosaic, a church now based in Hollywood.  He was the first Pastor I ever heard speak and I followed him for several years.  It was such a treat to know that he was making a special appearance at Vous Conference.  It really moved me to see him thanking Pastors Rich and Dawnchere for inviting him there, but more importantly, he professed that until his last breath, he would be forever grateful for their role in his son's life, who had fallen away from God/Church until they spoke prophetically into his life, changing the course of his life completely. 

• What do you want from God and what do you have?  Ask God for what you want and let Him let you know when you've asked for too much.  Don't limit God!

Finally, we heard from Christine Caine, whom I haven't heard of but the audience seemed to really look forward to her sermon.  If I were to pick one moment that resonated with me the most, it would be a moment that came from her message which I've written in blue in my summary below.

• You're going to live out a story for a while before it becomes a testimony.  The devil isn't afraid of a story, he is afraid of a testimony
• Being more than a conqueror means you come out of the battle, then you go back in to bring other people out
• Favor is for service, not for purpose
• God will always interrupt your own plans with His purpose
• What you have to fight is the "what if".  Replace what you don't know about the future with what you do know about God
• Impossible is where God starts

A photo posted by @trulyblessedssl on Jun 12, 2016 at 8:47pm PDT

That's What Friends Are For

It has been an excruciating couple of weeks where I have found myself on my knees at any given time and scouring the internet and the Bible for any hope that I can cling on to.  Typically, I internalize my struggles, but this time, I felt so weak that I had no choice but to lean on friends to pick me up off the ground and lend me their shoulders to cry on.  I am truly amazed at how they have been there for me.

Throughout my childhood and into my early 20's, I never felt like I had a core group of friends that would be there for me through thick and thin.  In fact, my so called friendships were filled with betrayals leaving to me to feel utterly alone and unworthy of true friendship.  Today, I find myself surrounded by so much love and support that I am truly humbled.  This is a testament to how good God is...that He will never give us more than we can handle and because I have Him and these dear friends in my life, one step at a time, I will be able to move forward.  Most of them don't have access to my blog, but even still, I feel compelled to "publicly" declare my gratitude for a few who truly have gone above and beyond to love and support me.

J&D - This couple I met only a year ago and J has been there for me beyond belief.  I didn't realize the magnitude of her commitment to me until the day I texted her the news and she immediately cancelled her girls night out with her friends and drove to my house to merely sit and listen.  Her hubby D joined us shortly after and together we sat in my backyard talking and laughing until 4AM.  They have opened their home to me and Echo when we needed to spend the night and have checked in with me almost every day to make sure I was "okay".  I know that though our friendship is young, they will always have a place in my heart.

D - She is a long time friend that I first met through work and has been with me every step of the way.  I try not to bug her with my problems because she juggles a full time job and is Mommy to 2 adorable kids, but when she called to say hello, I immediately shared with her my struggle.  I told her I needed to get away and without ANY hesitation, she booked a flight to meet me in my city of choice.  I now have something to look forward to over the next couple weeks.  Seriously, I am so humbled by her kindness and heart.  I love her.

K - I first met K back in 2002 during a trip to Hawaii and then lost touch for several years.  We recently reconnected and timing couldn't have been better.  He has listened to me cry for hours over the phone and repeatedly helps talk me through the process, picking up my broken pieces one at a time.  I know his heart truly has my best interest in mind and that he is there to listen to me fumble over the same regrets, the same fears, and the same "what-if" scenarios with endless patience.  Gosh, how did I end up so blessed to randomly meet someone who would end up helping me through one of the worst times of my life?

B&H - These two have the busiest schedules with demanding jobs, but B has reached out to me on a regular basis just to check in.  That is HUGE for her because she is not the best at keeping in touch, so for her to reach out several times a week...it's amazing!  Even when she and H were on their pseudo-honeymoon, she managed to text me to let me know she was still there, even if her responses were not as quick.  H has offered me insight and hope and has given me tangible advice to help me take one step forward, a day at a time.  What comfort it gives me to know that I can rely on them to offer me sound and practical advice.

S - This girl...she's really in the thick of it with me.  Like the others, she checks in with me on a regular basis and always offers to meet me wherever I am so that I am never alone.  I think she was the first person I called when the crap hit the fan and she listened to me cry for hours without judgement.  I love her because she loves me so much that it actually emotionally frustrates her to see me going through this.  Those are the best friends...the ones who get angry with you and cry alongside with you.

G - My amazing brother.  He isn't one to get emotional nor is he very good with comforting words, but his actions speak so loudly.  I know that I can rely on him during this period and that means the world to me.  I love him.

Last and certainly not least...God.  The mere fact that God has surrounded me with such an amazing support group says it all.  He may not be physically visible, but I know that He is here with me through my amazing friends and family.  I am learning what it means to truly rely on Him and to let go and allow Him to fight my battles for me.  I know that He can make all things new and can resurrect what is already dead, if it is in His will.  He knows the desires of my heart.  I don't have to do anything as my only "job" is to trust in Him, to seek Him and to rely on him 100%.  How comforting is that?  

Sympathy vs. Empathy

I was reminded of this video at church on Sunday when the guest speaker spoke of what it means to be empathetic.  This message is so powerful to me because I am someone who longs for connection with those I care about.  Without connection, there is a disconnect that grows and eventually drives a wedge between two people creating a distance that ultimately cultivates none but a superficial relationship with little to no depth.  But we humans are meant for so much more!

To grow in connection requires us to be vulnerable, to dig deep within ourselves and be authentic with our fears, struggles and pain.  And as Brene Brown shares in her video, to empathize with others and build a deeper connection is achieved by connecting with something within ourselves that knows the feeling the other person is feeling at that moment in time.  Some of my greatest connections with friends and significant others were built in the most vulnerable moments filled with tears and hopelessness, but most importantly, LOVE.  You're not a wuss if you allow yourself to be vulnerable with someone.  Life is exponentially more meaningful and fulfilling when you are so deeply connected with someone who's seen you at your best and loves you at your worst because you took that step to bare your soul and cut out the bullsh*t you hide behind.  So, the next time you feel alone, take that risk to let someone in.  And if you are that someone, soften your heart and try to empathize with them.  Build a safe fortress around the two of you and share your hearts.  You will be amazed and humbled by what happens next.

On the contrary, sympathy results in disconnection.  So many people think that sympathy helps "fix" things and is enough to make the other person "feel better", but in actuality, it has the opposite effect.  When someone is bummed about something, they don't need us to point out the silver lining or to hear us say "That sucks, I'm sorry" because that comes across as "I don't understand you" or "I don't really care", both of which creates distance.  When someone shares their heart with you, what they are really saying is "I am feeling alone in this, and I long to feel connected (with you)".  So let us throw sympathy out the door and invite empathy in and strive to connect, whether it be sharing a similar experience or giving them a big squeeze, sitting in silence, and reassuring them that they are not alone for you are with them.  

Because the truth is, rarely can a response make something better.  What makes something better, is connection.

Christian

This morning, I was late, really late for work so I pulled the oldest trick in the book by leaving my purse in my trunk and walking into the office with just my laptop so it would appear as though I was coming from a meeting.  When I got to my desk, I realized that I left my key fob in my purse (and trunk), so I went back to the garage to retrieve it.  There's a hidden button on my trunk that always allows me to open it once it beeps to let me know my key is inside (because I always accidentally close my trunk with my key in it!), but this time, it wouldn't budge.  Panic set in.

I Googled solutions online and the more I did, the more discouraged I felt.  No pass through to the trunk from the back seat because my car doesn't have that feature built in.  I would have to tow my car to the nearest dealership where I would have to buy a new key for $60-90.  I called the the dealership and they told me a similar story.  I was screwed.

I called AAA and they arrived within 5 mins.  Our plan was for me to quickly press the trunk release button once he got the door open (because my trunk automatically locks once the alarm is activated).  If that didn't work, he would disconnect the battery and then as he reconnected it, I would have a small window to press the release button again. We tried both and neither worked.

He then tried to bring my back seats down which of course, wouldn't go down except for the middle console.  Once the console was down, he saw that there was no opening to the trunk except for a thick piece of plastic between the back seat and the trunk that wouldn't budge.  I told him that all the Lexus forums said that there is no pass-through to the trunk.

My heart started to sink, and as he searched for a tool to pick my glove compartment lock (I had read there may be a trunk release in there and that I had experience picking locks in the past...er...my office desk drawer locks, that is), I said defeated, "Should we just tow my car to the nearest dealership?".  He responded by saying that if I wanted to do that, he could call a tow truck for me, but he believed that there had to be a way.  He just wasn't ready to give up even though I was.  And I really didn't know what he was talking about because there was no other way.  Everyone in the Lexus forums online would totally agree with me!

I went back to my desk to grab a paperclip to pick the lock, and when I came back down, my car was running and my trunk was open!  I ran over and asked him how he did it.  

Apparently, the plastic barrier in the back did open if you pushed it up then out!  He then proceeded to reach in and pull the latch in the trunk to pop it open.  I didn't know what to say.  He saved me so much trouble and so much money.  I asked him how I could ever thank him enough and he asked me to give me a good review when I received a survey for his services.  And then he said to me "See?  You just got to keep believing".  Then I asked him what his name was and he said "Christian".

I knew this was no coincidence.

Everything led me to this encounter and it was a reminder to stay in faith and keep believing because even when there doesn't seem to be a way, there is always a way through God.

I gave him a $40 tip which he reluctantly accepted and we both went our separate ways.  I hope for everything awesome in his life and that he knows that he was a blessing to me today in more ways than one.

Happy Tea Leaves

In the midst of a challenging week, I saw this...

 

Seriously, the tea leaves randomly formed a happy face at the bottom of my glass and it couldn't have happened at a more opportune time.  I have been immersing myself in scripture and devouring every prayer book handed to me in hopes of staying afloat, so it was as though God sent me a smile, reminding me that He is in control and has a plan for the greater good.  So amazing! 

"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand." Philippians 4:6

Proverbs 27:17

Photo courtesy of D

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.

I was listening to a message the other day about friendships and the speaker repeatedly alluded to the idea that the best way to get to know someone is through their friends.  I have been meditating on the following: If someone were to judge me, strictly based on my inner circle of friends without ever meeting me, would the outcome be worse, the same, or better, than if they were to make the decision based on their interaction with me? 

It is a resounding BETTER.  I could send any of my closest friends to an interview on my behalf and they would have a better chance of landing the job for me than I would.  I would drop my children off to any of these girls and know that they would come home even "better" than they were when I dropped them off.  I get breaks in life purely based on my associations with them that I could never get on my own because of who they are.  I am so blessed to have people in my life that challenge me to be better than I am.  People who push me to never settle for second best, but to always strive for more.  Every single person I consciously choose to let into my inner circle are people whom I admire.

On the contrary, I know people who allow their friends to pick up the keys after a long day/night of drinking.  People who give their friends a hard time when they can't make an event or stay the entire time because they have other priorities in their lives.  People who don't have your best interest in mind and would screw you over financially while their finances are completely in order.  And, pretty much the only opportunities they offer you in life are opportunities to drink and party.  Everyone is responsible for their own actions and decisions, but if someone is to call themselves a friend, he/she is also responsible for the well being of someone they supposedly care about.

I have to admit, it hasn't always been easy.  I've gone through many friendships through junior high, high school, college, and even now.  I have had my fair share of friends whom I partied with, accumulated a lot of history with, shared good times and bad times with, etc... but shortly after college, I realized that I had a choice.  I could choose who I let into my inner circle and that like it or not, the person I would ultimately become would be shaped by the people I surrounded myself with.  Some people go through life wondering why they don't grow or are stuck in a rut.  My advice to them would be to look at the people around you.  Are they where you'd want to be?  As you get older, life gets busier and time becomes more valuable.  I had to be smart about where I was spending my time and with whom.  Did I respect the way they lived their lives and did they respect the way I lived mine?  It wasn't about who was right or who was wrong, but about how I wanted to live my life.  One of my closest friends said to me once, as she saw me head down a downwards spiral, that the person I was becoming was no longer someone she could relate to.  That hit me like a ton of bricks because she was someone whom I respected and admired, and as far as good friends go, birds of a feather, flock together.  If she could no longer relate to me, what did that say about who I was becoming?  I have her to thank for getting me back on track!

I am not a spring chicken anymore and as I get older, friends will come and go and may even be few and far in between.  I pray that I will continue to have the wisdom to maintain the friendships that continually enrich both ways and the wisdom to walk away from those that don't.

Faith

[feyth]
–noun
 1. confidence or trust in a person or thing: faith in another's ability.
2. belief that is not based on proof.
3. a system of religious belief: the Christian faith

It's been a quiet weekend spent consumed in my own thoughts.  My only productive output in the past 60 hours is this simple art created to remind me to stay faithful through it all.